[Answered] Dysfunctional Relationships
Description
Instructions: Choose ONE of the following two options. Be sure not to repeat any part of your answers from Section One.
Option 1:
Using the following excerpts from the article “Is Your Relationship Dysfunctional?” by Randi Gunther PhD. to help you to structure and support your argument, discuss TWO of the following stories: “Young Goodman Brown,” “Rope,” “The Yellow Wallpaper,” and “The Boat.” In an essay of approximately 1000-1350 words, double-spaced in Times New Roman, 12-point font, identify how and why the various kinds of dysfunctional behaviour operate in the marriage depicted in each story, and note any similarities and differences between the stories that you find to be important.
All relationships are more or less dysfunctional in different ways and at different times. No perfect relationships exist…. But, if over time, more heartaches than good times happen, the relationship bond weakens. Significantly painful events that occur during that time can be deal-breakers. … If cumulatively dysfunctional interactions occur, the relationship will not likely survive a major deal-breaking situation. Suppressed disillusionments weaken that foundation and make the relationship more likely to fail.
Many couples push relationship distresses under the rug without resolution and find much later that they are unable to recover from these festering sorrows. Identifying and exploring these typical relationship damagers might have helped. …
Assignment of Blame
… This immediate response to a conflict predicts significant hopelessness for resolution. … No one feels good when their partners are disappointed, disillusioned, or blaming of them. People can get in terrible, repetitive arguments that go in circles for long periods of time, careening between blame and defensiveness.
Threats of exile or abandonment
… Blame activates fears of loss and feelings of worthlessness in the recipient, not good experiences for lovers to engender for any reason. … More men than women fear exile. More women than men fear abandonment. Both are the reciprocals of each other, and neither is ever a healthy way to resolve differences….
Dominance/Submission
…If the relationship is a power hierarchy where one partner consistently is on top, the other, more adaptive partner will eventually lose hope and stop fighting as hard in succeeding conflicts. That leaves all the responsibility for the outcome on the shoulders of the top guy, and submission, martyrdom, and resentment in the emotional belly of the other….
Grudges
Grudges come from unexplored, unexpressed, or powerless complaints that are not responded to with due consideration. Grudges can start small and seem too insignificant to fight about but, once buried, can fester and grow.
People who harbor grudges … often feel victimized by others, bitter about unfair losses, and resentful of actual or exaggerated injustices. When confronted by their partners, they usually will not reveal the depth of their resentment, but act it out in indirect ways or bring up a slew of past affronts in the middle of an argument.
Intimate partners who carry grudges don’t ever let go of the past. They feel powerless in the present without using grudges to fortify their position. Underneath, they often see themselves as people who have been repeatedly cheated. …
Winner or Loser Arguments
When couples argue, they usually stop listening to each other early in that conflict. Within a very short period of time, it would be difficult for either to know or understand what the other is feeling. Great conflict resolution, on the other hand, can only occur when the partners in an intimate relationship stay deeply connected to their own feelings and also those of the other….
Arguments are very different. Each partner will used [sic] whatever means are at hand to push his or her side of the “truth” no matter what the other needs. They may go on for round after round, losing sight of whatever they were arguing about to begin with, because neither is willing to give up his or her point of view or accept defeat. Eventually, all arguments cease. There is usually no clear winner or loser…. Assumptions are made on both sides and acted upon as if they were true…. The argument ends when one or the other partner is just too tired to go on and retreats. Too many of these unresolved conflicts predict potential relationship failure. Emotional scars form that can make each succeeding negative interaction less likely to result in healing.
Boundary Violations
Boundaries are the way people keep their internal vulnerabilities, concerns, and insecurities safe. … In dysfunctional relationships, one or both partners often feel little conflict about entering the other’s private world without permission. They believe that what is their partner’s is also theirs, without question or concern. That can apply to material things, thoughts, feelings, plans, or desires. … The other end of sorrowful dysfunction is when a partner doesn’t know his or her boundary rights and gives up what is their right without question or argument. That means acquiescing to any demand the other partner wants, whether it is good for them or not
Solution
People understand relationships and love differently. Love varies depending on who is involved, but people prefer to be in a relationship with someone they are compatible with. To be able to get a good relationship that is not dysfunctional is not easy. A study shows that the ability to have a non-dysfunctional relationship starts when the connection is still young when both partners meet the expectations that they have for each other. Those relationships are not circumstances, but they seem to demonstrate designs of referring to others. Broken relationships occur for some reasons, and the relationship’s failure is often a source of good mental distress. Most of us have to be conscious to control these skills needed to make them grow………………Purchase the link to access the full answer @$16
